Lee! I'm the same, I self-doubt all the time. This morning, after I published a poem I worked on until late last night, because once I start I'm like a dog with a bone, I began to hyper-ventilate, telling myself what was the point. I've done that pretty much all my life. I'm 63. I've made bags, in fabric and in crochet. I sold quite a few. I had fun with that for a while, and then I came back to writing, something I'd abandoned for over twenty years because I was terrified of being a failure, or being crap, of what people might think, etc etc. I'm almost almost over that. Especially when I write my lighter poems. Last night's was not one of my light ones! So I worry and hold my tummy in and squeeze my bum and wonder whether nobody gets it, etc etc. I didn't notice any typos, by the way, I was too busy reading reading reading, gobling it all up. If you ever need reassurance, I'm here! Big hugs!
Today I was thinking about what I saw this morning on television and the ugly images angry people posted on Instagram or Facebook of the man in the office in the US. I was thinking about what to present in this evenings zoom artistgroup. Could we decide to ignore all this and plant new small seeds to grow in the dark and just water it when it's getting warmer? I was all focused on the man and felt anger and dispair. And was walking in a kind of trance and just watched the pavement so I would not fall. And suddenly I realised without him even knowing me, I gave away my power. I just had to look up, and realise I was walking along the Mediteranean see in the south of Spain, the sun is shining, and calm waves came to the shore having a very calming sound. And I wanted to save the world, or my zoomgroup and be special. What if being calm and doing my thing (in my case making another flower, not the most surprising topic to choose for textile art and embroidery) I can overthink and try to find an clever answer with my mind how this mess of a world happened, and wonder about is ther actually something we call enlightment and a way up for us people? Or I can focus on my materials and making flowers, or even just sitting on the balcony and close my eyes. Is one of these more important than the other? What do you think I should be doing and why? I enjoyed your writing again, although it shouldn't matter so much I think. Are there still things that ligth a spark in you? I my humble opinion that is often the way to go. But your ways might be different. xxx
ow, and I have discalculy and dislexia, (and don't remember how to spell that....and on a certain day I decided to don't bother anymore to put texts in autocorrect to clean up my mistakes in spelling. It's just to tiring, I decided that I was allowed to just write to express myself. And people can be anoyed (or not) by my spelling. xxx Now I have to do the same with the rest of the things I do.....be free of rejectments and ignore the people who think they need to help me without me asking them to do so. xxx
Lee! I'm the same, I self-doubt all the time. This morning, after I published a poem I worked on until late last night, because once I start I'm like a dog with a bone, I began to hyper-ventilate, telling myself what was the point. I've done that pretty much all my life. I'm 63. I've made bags, in fabric and in crochet. I sold quite a few. I had fun with that for a while, and then I came back to writing, something I'd abandoned for over twenty years because I was terrified of being a failure, or being crap, of what people might think, etc etc. I'm almost almost over that. Especially when I write my lighter poems. Last night's was not one of my light ones! So I worry and hold my tummy in and squeeze my bum and wonder whether nobody gets it, etc etc. I didn't notice any typos, by the way, I was too busy reading reading reading, gobling it all up. If you ever need reassurance, I'm here! Big hugs!
Same! Off to read your poems now 🙏
Ha there is an unfinished bit and quite a few type os. 🥳 Off to the convent now… maybe I will correct later
Today I was thinking about what I saw this morning on television and the ugly images angry people posted on Instagram or Facebook of the man in the office in the US. I was thinking about what to present in this evenings zoom artistgroup. Could we decide to ignore all this and plant new small seeds to grow in the dark and just water it when it's getting warmer? I was all focused on the man and felt anger and dispair. And was walking in a kind of trance and just watched the pavement so I would not fall. And suddenly I realised without him even knowing me, I gave away my power. I just had to look up, and realise I was walking along the Mediteranean see in the south of Spain, the sun is shining, and calm waves came to the shore having a very calming sound. And I wanted to save the world, or my zoomgroup and be special. What if being calm and doing my thing (in my case making another flower, not the most surprising topic to choose for textile art and embroidery) I can overthink and try to find an clever answer with my mind how this mess of a world happened, and wonder about is ther actually something we call enlightment and a way up for us people? Or I can focus on my materials and making flowers, or even just sitting on the balcony and close my eyes. Is one of these more important than the other? What do you think I should be doing and why? I enjoyed your writing again, although it shouldn't matter so much I think. Are there still things that ligth a spark in you? I my humble opinion that is often the way to go. But your ways might be different. xxx
ow, and I have discalculy and dislexia, (and don't remember how to spell that....and on a certain day I decided to don't bother anymore to put texts in autocorrect to clean up my mistakes in spelling. It's just to tiring, I decided that I was allowed to just write to express myself. And people can be anoyed (or not) by my spelling. xxx Now I have to do the same with the rest of the things I do.....be free of rejectments and ignore the people who think they need to help me without me asking them to do so. xxx